What are you afraid of?

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 Feeling scared…What are you afraid of? Curling up in a ball…. What are you really fucking afraid of ? Facing my fucking shit.

Saying out loud outside of myself what the fuck happened to me

How I feel afraid sometimes. Naked and no voice. I must have done something horrible to men in a past life? What the fuck! Yes there is Karma but what about your feelings?

This is not about beating yourself up or thinking you’re a slut and a nothing. You learned to believe that about yourself. You can rewrite that story.

You were sobbing on the floor… A friend called you on your shit on your distracting yourself from staring down the face of your own dark shadows. He isn’t putting up with your BS neither should you.

“Oh, go fuck yourself!” Eve I want to hear what you have to say.Here goes a telling of some of what happened to me

You feel so good…look how pretty you are… Oh go fuck yourself? Maybe I have given you HIV Oh go fuck your crazy ass self

Lets do it…you’ve done it with everybody No No Fucking No!!!!!!

You are my wife I can have you when I want you.

This is my pussy. I can beat it if I want. I can hurt you if I want to. Doesn’t that turn you on?

Fuck you fuck you!! You fucking hurt me. You were the best rapist I ever had. Go fuck yourself!

You are someone I have seen from time to time. We are just dating you aren’t my girlfriend. I thought we were together. I see you with someone else.

I have to be ok with it. Don’t make a scene. We were sleeping together three days ago. Three fucking days ago you told me you love me.

Fuck you Fuck you. You can’t help yourself. You are an artist.

What is the common denominator here? Me!!!

Getting involved with men I can help. I forget about what I want and get distracted. From what? From really being vulnerable. Being myself Not in control.

It scares the shit out of me. You think you have to hurt like you’ve been hurt in the past?

You’re speaking up for yourself and setting boundaries this will protect you. Love is scary but it won’t destroy you(maybe your ego if you ar lucky). Love will inspire you and make you grow. if you are with someone who is your equal not someone you has more of his own dark shadows to face and won’t.

Keep looking at your dark shadows.

This is a doorway for you Eve. You are courageous. This is for you to open and nobody else.

You got a chunk out and I am proud of you. I love you.

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